“Someone, somewhere needs the next page
of your book now!”
My friend Rachel tossed me this motivator a while ago now. I was discussing the difficulties of writing my memoir.
Since school went back, I’m focusing on finishing it. It is the ‘work’ goal / theme – This doesn’t mean I will ever manage to sit down and write for 6 or 7 hours a day. Some writing of memoir is about coming to terms with the stuff you’re trying to get on the page. It takes shape, reforms or comes into view as the words bleed onto the page. I find it satisfying but not always a quick or easy process.
The ‘focusing’ part is a bit like bringing a sail boat into the wind: I’m letting a few things go whilst I tighten up and steer a new course. Same boat, same destination just a different tack for now.
One of the things I’m letting go, is a focus on social media. I started this blog to get support for the lonely task of writing. Somewhere along the way, I’ve become enchanted by the constant interaction blogging can generate. Unfortunately however, it doesn’t write a book. And enchanted is a deliberate choice of words here as I’m almost spellbound, certainly compelled to join in with most things I come across! It’s a little addictive..
One psychology piece I came across this week explained teenage brains are highly reward focused and how short term rewards can drive certain behaviours such as computer gaming.
Hmmm. I’m a fan of killing a few trolls on my iPad whilst drinking my first cup of tea of the day (and the second and -oh-help-me- sometimes the third..) I’m no longer a teenager but it got me thinking about how the constant interaction with Twitter and my blog might be providing more of a ‘reward’ than I realised.
When you read some of the research around habit breaking and addiction including everything from overeating to less obvious habits like interrupting people, a major learning is that breaking one habit is easier if you break several all in one go – A large shift in state allows a bit more mental reprocessing and perhaps there’s less association with the gaps where the old habit would like to maintain its cosy place!
So, I’ve put away my iPad – I’ve replaced trollicide with writing any old blather whilst drinking that first cup of tea.
I’ve been through all my social media accounts and removed all text notifications so I’m not interrupted / distracted / tempted by the chimes and boings that go off as something new comes in.
I’ve designated Friday as Blog Admin Day. So far, so good. I’ve written up my contribution to the dice generated BiteSizeMemoir and posted it. I’ve replied to various comments. I’ve written this post and started on a couple more including one outlining changes to Bite Size Memoir and another finishing off my Chemobrain Series. All in all, the day has felt focused with ‘permission’ to blog whilst also being undistracted by everything else on my To Do List.
My pedometer is on and the phone is out. I’ve walked and talked with real human beings this week – exercising and getting a communication fix all at the same time.
I’m having less success dumping the carbs from my diet but I am persisting !
Over the summer I was less in control of my time because we had a lot on. And Max was home – he had coursework and lines to learn and wanted testing. Sometimes he even wanted to chat! I needed to be more flexible, rather than have the anal structure being on my own allows. The irony was, I also noticed I got more done.
In the week after Max went back to school, I sank in the space he left behind. And it had me thinking about the saying attributed to Elbert Hubbard:
If you want something done, ask a busy man, for the other kind has no time.
So crazy as it might sound, I’ve resolved to put more back in my schedule (rather than the ‘space’ I was allowing for writing) and see if I get more done. If I only end up with an hour to write some days, maybe I’ll make sure I use it more effectively! So far, I’ve joined a writer’s group, signed up for a writer’s class and begun sticking friends in for walks and coffees. There’s a photography workshop on the horizon too. Even the ironing is kept up to date daily!
I had been toying with writing one combined post a week, including the Bite Size Memoir prompts but have decided to keep posts focused on one thing only. I think that way they’ll be quicker to write and readers will soon know whether it’s one they want to read or not!
The upshot is though, some actual writing and editing has already taken place this week in calmer, more productive sessions but with the energy and focus that had been slipping away before the summer. I feel in control and rather excited about it.
I know I’m not alone in needing to sort the balance out between the various things I would like to achieve so I’m interested to hear from anyone else with more ideas and suggestions. I’ll report back from time to time as ideas work or fail!
September 30, 2014 at 7:46 pm
I tried a schedule like this:
Monday – Twitter
Tuesday – GoodReads
Wednesday – Blog
Thursday – relax!
Friday – copywriting
Sat and Sun – fiction
It lasted two weeks. Then I got burned out. Had to take three weeks off to recuperate. I came back fresh, and my writing improved. So,lesson # 1: I need downtime to recharge, to fill the well.
I also discovered that I need more time to focus, so I’m trying this now:
Week 1 – devote to writing blog posts. Schedule them and then leave the blog for three weeks.
Week 2 – devote to copywriting
Week 3 – devote to my fiction writing
Week 4 – take a vacation from all writing
I also need to limit my time on Twitter to…oh, twenty minutes a day. Tops.
Yeah, like that works.
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October 2, 2014 at 2:58 pm
Hi Diane
I have tried all manner of approaches and to an extent, being flexible and changing to a new routine when I feel the need for change – is sometimes as good as a rest. Writing my memoir is sometimes emotionally exhausting so I have found times when I’ve done 6 hours, several days in a row – a bit debilitating, hard to switch out of the negative zone and then when I do, it fuels procrastination of the type that avoids hard things. – And then I don’t write for too long.
So, I’m currently back to forcing a word count 5 days a week – with a timer going – so I can be clear with myself when I’m probably not focusing properly!
As for blog admin day.. Hmmm .. is this Friday yet? Epic fail! (But I’m killing half an hour and fussing Darth Vader who has torn up ear until I go to the vets.. along with other excuses!)
Good to hear what you are up to. We are ourselves, a Work In Progress 😀
Lisa xx
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September 23, 2014 at 1:03 pm
It sounds as if you are really getting to grips with your renewed schedule Lisa, so glad for you, and I do understand why seeming to take on more actually helps. I do the same and need to have the human contact as much as I love the blog interaction too. But it is vital to keep the balance fresh and workable. I felt that I was at long last getting on top of everything last week, especially after dispelling my writing fears about my memoir and feeling re-energised and raring to go once more, and then my daughter was taken ill. I found having to put all my planned posts, WIPs and memoir writing to one side again after having just got back on top so very difficult. I know it’s only 3 days and my daughter’s health was my priority but it threw me. Plus of course my concern for her and not being to sleep in the hospital brought me down a little. If I can just achieve the small goals I set myself each day then I feel I haven’t failed and I feel better about it. If not, then I find it hard to get out of the cycle. It is the feeling of being in control that is so vital. I’m so with you on that…and I’m so glad that you seem to be there and long may it reign. I’m chasing you and hoping to be there back there again soon…but right now I’m still overwhelmed…although I’m now going for a walk as I know that always helps
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September 23, 2014 at 8:30 pm
One of the things I find helps me is allowing time for preparing to start rather than “I hope I start in the next few days”. Playing psychologist on myself 🙂 I gave myself a week and a half when school started back – just to sort the ironing, organise my notes, stick friends in the diary, write lists of ideas and tasks etc. Then I started! Not exactly SuperMario yet, but as the start day itself was a success and a few others pockets here and there, I have hope for a gradual growth in output!
Meanwhile, be kind to yourself. You’ve had quite a scare and that rattles everything. Hope you sleep well after that walk!
Lxx
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September 24, 2014 at 11:18 am
Thanks Lisa…will do – and here’s to that growth in output for us both 🙂
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September 23, 2014 at 12:27 pm
It sounds to me you are on the right track Lisa. I’ll be interested to hear how you find your writing group. I was in a great one in Gloucester but since moving have tried several and they have not given me what I need – which is critical comment. You have to set your priorities and I’m not posting as much and I’m not getting around others sites as much. I miss it but I have too much on my plate and something had to give. Glad to hear you are writing on your memoir everyday. My troll is spider. I now restrict myself to a few games before I go to sleep at night which of course wakes me up if I become frustrated with my lack of wins. It used to be whenever I turned the computer on – so a big improvement.
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September 23, 2014 at 8:18 pm
You make me laugh! I’m guessing Spider is an on-line card game!? Sad, but if I play anything electronic in the evening I’m planting towers in my sleep. Day 8 successfully completed now without killing a single thing.. I’m doing well – not a whole lot more writing yet on the book, but overall more productive and probably in a better mood !
I have met the writing group once and then had a chat with an ex-member – I’m not sure I’m going to get any critical input either. We had fun using some cards for a writing prompt but I’ll need to see if there’s anymore I can glean from it.
No doubt be keeping you all posted as that’ll help me focus! I have a ‘work-date’ with a friend on Thursday! Coffee shop – laptops – no talking for 2 hours!! That’s the aim anyway 😀
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September 23, 2014 at 10:09 pm
I’ll be interested to hear how the coffee shop goes to. I don’t know that I could keep my mouth shut for two hours with a friend….then again maybe.
All the writing groups I have tried here consist of reading your piece out with everyone listening then on to the next person. The only thing you get from it is if they laugh appropriately etc. Then you do a writing prompt but I don’t need that particularly now with blogging.
The group in Gloucester were great. Someone else read your piece cold as a reader would. That really showed up the clumsy areas and those needing punctuation, work etc. Everyone would then workshop the piece. The aim was not to change the person’s voice but look at grammar, places that people didn’t understand what was meant etc. We all learnt a lot from it and I miss it keenly. I guess that is perhaps what your editor is doing for you. 🙂
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September 27, 2014 at 11:40 am
Coffee shop work day was hilarious! Both of us were late to start with and my friend ended up with a slightly poorly child in tow – and then I had to spend the first hour trying out-of-the-way hardware stores for a new battery for my car key fob for my keyless start car! I was late in the first place because I’d spent too long dressing up and doing my hair as if I was going to work. (It had seemed right to ‘get into role’) By the time I eventually sat down with a coffee I was a disheveled mess!
However, we both beavered away for about an hour and the presence of someone else kept me persisting! As we’d both spent time the night before, organising and planning what we were going to do and then found we were revved up to finish the pieces we were working on, we agreed it was useful. Repeating the exercise on Tuesday, hopefully will get 2 hours done this time!
As for the writing group – I think I’m going to conclude similar things. However, the class I’ve started is looking very promising and the author running that will be a useful fountain of the sort of information I am after. And she promises the constructive feedback that makes your writing better rather than just makes you feel better! Lxx
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September 27, 2014 at 11:59 am
The coffee shop sounds kind of fun in a Faulty Towers sought of way but also seems like it may have promise. I’ll expect the next instalment next week. I’m not surprised about the writing group – I think they are rare to get a good critical group but glad your class is also promising. The things we try. I am giving a paper on Monday at a conference in Brisbane and to get there for the early start on Monday I’m heading off tomorrow. I’m going early. An afternoon and night in a hotel room alone I believe I will get so much writing done. Time will tell.
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September 23, 2014 at 12:35 am
Some sound advice here, and that first quote was … well it was special. I’m going to have to write that down somewhere.
“Somewhere along the way, I’ve become enchanted by the constant interaction blogging can generate.” – Oh, yes. The problem with blogging is we all start with such good intentions. I try to use it as a break from my ‘real’ writing, but sometimes it seems to take over most of my freetime.
I’ve gotten into the habit of writing my word count goal (or chapter goal) on a piece of paper, and leaving it by my keyboard. It’s a guilt trip, and it’s working.
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September 23, 2014 at 10:29 am
Will try that guilt tip! I use scrivener when I write and it provides an on-screen visual of how far you’ve filled the bar. When you get there – there’s a lovely ‘ping’! – However that doesn’t make me fire up the application to start with so I’ll make a great big dirty sign each night and stick it on my keyboard!
Meanwhile.. still struggling with my addiction to all things on-line. I keep meeting enchanting people! See you again soon I hope 😀
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September 23, 2014 at 12:20 pm
Without a doubt, Lisa
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September 20, 2014 at 3:44 am
That’s a great idea, to have a blog admin day. Balance is a daily dance and you’re setting the rhythm. Glad to see Bite Size Memoirs has returned. It’s all process and while you can take classes for craft, no one trains a writer. You have to learn on the job!
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September 21, 2014 at 10:13 am
Overall the first ‘Blog Admin Day’ was a great success – particularly in my head – as I wasn’t torn between other tasks. I felt like I’d turned up to an office to do a job, which was a breakthrough – working at home is so tricky at times! However, I’m here on Sunday morning finishing up on a post that must go out Monday and have some catch-up on post commitments over the coming weeks so it might be ‘Blog Admin Day and a Half” for a while!
As for the class – it’s as much about a creative outlet that I hope might be social too. There seemed to be another element of synchronicity because I don’t live in a place normally big enough to run such a class! Like the Universe was saying – “Well, here you are! Don’t say I don’t provide..” I just hope enough people turn up on Wednesday to make it viable! Lxx
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September 20, 2014 at 12:04 am
Lisa, As a memoir writer and weekly devotion blogger I, too, have to focus and make time to write. Thank you for this timely message.
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September 21, 2014 at 10:01 am
Thanks Berta – Writing it all down helps me explore my thinking and crystallise what to do. Seems I need to revisit it regularly to keep on track! There’ll no doubt be more! Hope you are making space for your writing, Lisa xx
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